Sometimes I just sit and wonder about dynamics.
The dynamics of love and relationship,connections and all of that stuff.
The reasons why in life I have met two wonderful people I was ready to spend a lifetime with but thye just wouldn be with me.
Is there something about me besides my head that says go aways?
I really wondr.
So I have decided to face my issues,my fears and insecurities.
I know that as a protective mechanism I have always thought of myself as not being too out there.
I don’t want people to see my butt,I don’t want anyone to know how big my breasts are,I want to hide my figure,everything.
I have dressed down in colour and all u could think of.
I wouldn wear high red shoes until a year ago,I would never buy a red bag,plenty of issues.
It was just all about hiding.
My physical appearance didn put anyone off,once they got attracted.
I just wonder what does.
SIn case,I think I was so besotted with him,with how wonderful he was and with all the connection,we overdid everything from the beginning.
Somehow it felt to me like this was it….i was lost in the euphoria and all of that mushy stuff that leavbes u gasping for air just cos u talkked to another human being.
Gosh,I doubt if I will ever feel that way again.
I do not remember being that excited about anyone.
I was so insecure and it shone thru so clearly.
I mean,u cant imagine the ways how.
I was mature in other things but in handling a realationship,naa.
I didn’t know how to be manipulative and yes,I was quite gullible to the things people had to say.
It took so long for the scales to fall off my eyes…and of course first things first I blamed him because who else wouldn
Maybe I wouldn have been happy with him that’s why I met him at the time I did and learnt all the lessons I needed to learn from that experience.
So I lost out on that one but I guess they say that its not lost till its gone right?Yes of course.
When they told me I should have taken the high road all the way maybe it’s the way I handled that situation that said oh yeah,she's in love wiv me now.
no denying that we made great converse that’s not all there is to life but I havent been looking at it like that.
So the lessons I learnt from this I am already enforcing in every other relationship I have going.
I learnt something,I wont deny it.
1.never let emotions get the better of you
2.control ur temper and act clever like u really are.
3.it's never about you.
4.alwyas pray to God to reveal the reasons why someone is in your life
5.never ever jump to conclusions-he likes me,I like him,wer an item
6.the cell phone-no speed dial and keep smses to a bare minimum
7.no matter how strong the connection,don’t bare ur heart…he will still judge you.
8.dont develop feelings until his are palpable and visible.
9.never ever assume anything.u must hear it…
10.be yourself anyway,the real mccoy will still stroll along near u.
The dynamics of love and relationship,connections and all of that stuff.
The reasons why in life I have met two wonderful people I was ready to spend a lifetime with but thye just wouldn be with me.
Is there something about me besides my head that says go aways?
I really wondr.
So I have decided to face my issues,my fears and insecurities.
I know that as a protective mechanism I have always thought of myself as not being too out there.
I don’t want people to see my butt,I don’t want anyone to know how big my breasts are,I want to hide my figure,everything.
I have dressed down in colour and all u could think of.
I wouldn wear high red shoes until a year ago,I would never buy a red bag,plenty of issues.
It was just all about hiding.
My physical appearance didn put anyone off,once they got attracted.
I just wonder what does.
SIn case,I think I was so besotted with him,with how wonderful he was and with all the connection,we overdid everything from the beginning.
Somehow it felt to me like this was it….i was lost in the euphoria and all of that mushy stuff that leavbes u gasping for air just cos u talkked to another human being.
Gosh,I doubt if I will ever feel that way again.
I do not remember being that excited about anyone.
I was so insecure and it shone thru so clearly.
I mean,u cant imagine the ways how.
I was mature in other things but in handling a realationship,naa.
I didn’t know how to be manipulative and yes,I was quite gullible to the things people had to say.
It took so long for the scales to fall off my eyes…and of course first things first I blamed him because who else wouldn
Maybe I wouldn have been happy with him that’s why I met him at the time I did and learnt all the lessons I needed to learn from that experience.
So I lost out on that one but I guess they say that its not lost till its gone right?Yes of course.
When they told me I should have taken the high road all the way maybe it’s the way I handled that situation that said oh yeah,she's in love wiv me now.
no denying that we made great converse that’s not all there is to life but I havent been looking at it like that.
So the lessons I learnt from this I am already enforcing in every other relationship I have going.
I learnt something,I wont deny it.
1.never let emotions get the better of you
2.control ur temper and act clever like u really are.
3.it's never about you.
4.alwyas pray to God to reveal the reasons why someone is in your life
5.never ever jump to conclusions-he likes me,I like him,wer an item
6.the cell phone-no speed dial and keep smses to a bare minimum
7.no matter how strong the connection,don’t bare ur heart…he will still judge you.
8.dont develop feelings until his are palpable and visible.
9.never ever assume anything.u must hear it…
10.be yourself anyway,the real mccoy will still stroll along near u.
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